Me / Random Ramblings

Problem Solved, Thanks Universe!

 

Yesterday I was pondering a dilemma, (Is it better to say what’s on your mind, even if it risks upsetting someone?) today, as if the universe were looking for an answer for me, it appeared.

Ameena Falchetto, a fellow expat and blogger found this blog post, “The Complete Guide to not giving a Fuck” and as the title suggests, it held my answer. At the end of the post, Julien Smith, the author, gives 5 steps to reclaiming your self respect. One of his steps rang loud and clear for me:

STEP 4. Tell the truth.

You don’t need to be an asshole, but the world does not need another conflict-avoidant, evasive person. No one wants another individual who steps in line with everyone else. The status quo is doing fine without you, so it’s up to you to call bullshit if you see it.

Don’t mind-read either. Telling the truth means seeing the truth, not adding your own layer of sugar coating or suspected emotion on top of it.

Ok, THANK YOU Julien Smith! (his blog is brilliant by the way!)  I hear you! I am who I am, I need to embrace that, no-one likes a bullshitter, right? Being honest is ok and I don’t need everyone to like me. (his fact number 2)

I needed to read this today. Thank you Universe for solving my dilemma, Julien for writing this and of course, Ameena for drawing my attention to it!

What do you think? Are you ready to reclaim your self respect? Give this blog a read, its worth it!

 

 

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5 thoughts on “Problem Solved, Thanks Universe!

    • you need to click on the word “THIS” in the sentence “fellow blogger and expat found this blog post”
      It’ll take you to the complete post with all the steps. They are all very good!

      Lou xo

  1. Excellent post – This blog and the one I just read by Julien, pretty much sums everything up that I have been feeling and doing since my last relationship break-up. I was very much standing in the middle, scared to alienate people and fall out with folk that I tried my damn best to try and accept a situation that I should NEVER have walked into. Ever. I had my reasons for giving it a go, however I now realise I shouldn’t have gone ahead. My self-respect is in a completely different place thesedays. In fact not giving a fuck has very much been an internal change I’ve been going through for the past wee while, it’s been a gradual process, I just didn’t really realise until recently, as I was still people pleasing a bit and thinking I was getting it wrong.

    Turns out I was supposed to trip up a fair few times, embarrass myself to hell and back, look a fool, say the wrong things, say nothing, befriend the wrong people (for me – I’m not saying they were ‘wrong’ or bad people!). It’s become part of my life now to keep cutting certain people out – once I learn the lesson, I do not cling, hang-on, push or pull – I feel way better to walk away and close that door forever. That’s even included 2 people I’ve known for over a decade as well as some more recent cut-offs. I’m glad I don’t give a crap anymore – less stress and I’m free to go wherever I choose with whomever I choose, without any obligations to any part of the past. I cannot abide being tied to the past and I think it’s very much an ego based, fear thing that keep people clinging on – that’s an observation and not a judgement as everyone has the right to live their life the way they see fit, plus I’m speaking from experience.

    Not giving a fuck really can be a lonely place for a wee while (but you get used to the discomfort and it actually becomes quite cool as you realise who and what is important) plus you are more aware of your own actions as well as others and there are certain situations you will not participate in anymore and that includes some friendships – this is because you can now see the truth of the situation. Once you get to the point its actually quite liberating. Being able to call the bullshit yet staying in amongst it is not the way I run my life. Burning bridges is sometimes the healthier thing to do. Yep, not giving a fuck involves a lot of bridge burning and door closing LOL. That is not to say I wish harm or ill feeling on anyone that’s crossed my path – I just simply choose not to be like them. If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.

    There are always other options, friends & experiences to be had. I refuse to stay where I am once I make my mind up or once others have said their piece. There’s a time and a place for giving an opinion. Conflict avoidance and being evasive is actually a right royal pain in the arse and as for the status quo?? Keep that too, plus they are a crap band LOL. On the flipside, I think there is a need for conflict avoidant, fence sitters – they keep the safe space for all those folk who can’t deal with their own issues by themselves and who need that extra helping hand and they get to feel important. To me it’s all very sycophantic, but to others it may be fantastic and a well needed place to be and that’s cool. I call the bullshit when I see it as well, but sometimes people won’t like you for it and that’s just fine by me too. At the end of the day, we’re all in this world together but as long as folk can find peace within whatever situation they find themselves and find peace within their own selves then it’s all good :-)

    Great entry and it’s actually solidified a few things for me :-)

  2. “If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.” I love this. Thank you so much for your comment. You once again, keep me engaged…in my own blog, thats quite an achievement! :)

    Come back soon!

    xo

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